Thursday, June 29, 2006

Redemption

I have had to address lately, the 'hate on' I have had for Madonna, for what seems like the majority of my adult life. I think the majority of my disdain has come from the fact that I viewed Madonna as a self promoting, megalomaniac. I could never really take her seriously, and was often offended by her overt sexual escapades, that quite frankly seemed to make 'porn star' behavior, mainstream fodder for the masses.

It concerned me that her following was predominantly gay men, and adolescent teenage girls, arguably a demographic of 'impressionable' individuals searching to find their identity. To follow Madonna as a 'supreme deity' is a rather disconcerting pursuit.

In recent years I have observed a 'maturing' Madonna, one who has admitted to wanting to look deeper into the meaning and depth of human existence.

At first I was skeptical, thinking it was the latest 're-invention', but nothing more than surface rhetoric. I have seen people around me sporting the 'Kabala' red wrist tie, and can assure you they are no more 'enlightened' than a wet blanket.

But having just watched the 'Re-Invention' tour concert CD, I was suitably impressed with what I saw. She seemed centred, and introspective. The birth of her daughter caused her to take stock on her life, and identify who she was, and where she was going. She admitted to being an 'idiot', and 'not thinking' in her earlier days. I respect her for her admission. I believe when 'you know better', 'you do better', it's great to see her respecting herself, and showing greater respect for others around her. Motherhood really seems to have agreed with her.

So, cheers to Madonna, and my new found 'like' for her.

Monday, June 26, 2006

What The Bleep Do We Know???

Synopsis: WHAT THE BLEEP DO WE KNOW?! is a new type of film. It is part documentary, part story, and part elaborate and inspiring visual effects and animations. The protagonist, Amanda, played by Marlee Matlin, finds herself in a fantastic Alice in Wonderland experience when her daily, uninspired life literally begins to unravel, revealing the uncertain world of the quantum field hidden behind what we consider to be our normal, waking reality.

She is literally plunged into a swirl of chaotic occurrences, while the characters she encounters on this odyssey reveal the deeper, hidden knowledge she doesn’t even realize she has asked for. Like every hero, Amanda is thrown into crisis, questioning the fundamental premises of her life – that the reality she has believed in about how men are, how relationships with others should be, and how her emotions are affecting her work isn’t reality at all!

As Amanda learns to relax into the experience, she conquers her fears, gains wisdom, and wins the keys to the great secrets of the ages, all in the most entertaining way. She is then no longer the victim of circumstances, but she is on the way to being the creative force in her life. Her life will never be the same.

The chorus members act as hosts who live outside of the story, and from this Olympian view, comment on the actions of the characters below. They are also there to introduce the Great Questions framed by both science and religion, which divides the film into a series of acts. Through the course of the film, the distinction between science and religion becomes increasingly blurred, since we realize that, in essence, both science and religion describe the same phenomena.

The film employs animation to realize the radical knowledge that modern science has unearthed in recent years. Powerful cinematic sequences explore the inner-workings of the human brain. Quirky animation introduces us to the smallest form of consciousness in the body – the cell. Dazzling visuals reinforce the film’s message in an exciting, powerful way. Done with humor, precision, and irreverence, these scenes are only part of what makes this film unique in the history of cinema, and a true box-office winner.

Rent this movie. It's a must see!!!

Wednesday, June 21, 2006

Why Do You Have To Be So Hard To Love


Was it some man that didn't treat you right
Left you reaching out for him in the middle of the night
Is there some heartache that you can't out run
That makes you so afraid to get close to anyone

You're so - easy to look at
You're so easy to hold
It's so easy to touch you - but so hard to let go
It's so easy to want you - that I can't get enough
Tell me why do you have to be
Why do you have to be so hard to love

Is it some hurt from long ago
That makes it so hard to let your feelings show
Is it the ghost of who you used to be
That makes you so afraid to bear your soul to me

You're so - easy to look at
You're so easy to hold
It's so easy to touch you honey - but so hard to let go
It's so easy to want you - that I can't get enough
Tell me why do you have to be
Why do you have to be so hard to love

Tell me, tell me, tell me....Why do you have to be so hard to love....

Tell me....Why do you have to be so hard to love.....

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Confessions on a Dance Floor


Ok, I bought it, it means nothing. There is still no shrine, but damn, I love this CD. A few of my gay friends shed a tear over my purchase, their Darran is growing up(sniff).

JUMP

There’s only so much you can learn in one place
The more that I wait, the more time that I waste

I haven’t got much time to waste, it’s time to make my way
I’m not afraid of what I’ll face, but I’m afraid to stay
I’m going down my own road and I can make it alone
I'll work and I'll fight, Till I find a place of my own

Are you ready to jump?
Get ready to jump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby,
Yes, I’m ready to jump
Just take my hands
Get ready to jump

We learned our lesson from the start, my sisters and me
The only thing you can depend on is your family
And life’s gonna drop you down like the limbs of a tree
It sways and it swings and it bends until it makes you see

Are you ready to jump?
Get ready to jump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby
Yes, I’m ready to jump
Just take my hands
Get ready to, are you ready?

(Spoken:)
There’s only so much you can learn in one place
The more that you wait, the more time that you waste

I'll work and I'll fight till I find a place of my own
It sways and it swings and it bends until you make it your own

I can make it alone(my sisters and me) (repeat 7x)

Are you ready to jump?
Get ready to jump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby
Yes, I’m ready to jump
Just take my hands
Get ready to jump

Are you ready to jump?
Get ready to jump
Don’t ever look back, oh baby
Yes, I’m ready to jump
Just take my hands
Get ready to, are you ready?

Monday, June 19, 2006

Hamilton Pride 2006

Hamilton hosted Pride 2006 this past weekend. It proved to be an amazing time. My weekend started Friday night at a house party, and then spilled over to Clubbing on the Friday and Saturday nights. I met two great new friends on the Friday night, Laura and Sandro. It's funny how 'connections' can happen in an instant, and a friendship is quickly established. Also met a 'cutie' named Darryl, who was so much fun.

The energy at the Saturday night Pride party was awesome. My friend Gene performed in drag and was the best performance of the night in my opinion.
I don't venture out into Hamilton very often, I tend to go out more in Toronto, however after this weekend, I am going to revisit that.

Living in Burlington, it's much closer, and I met a lot more local people. It's great to have a network of friends so much closer to home.

Thanks Gene, Olisa and Don. It may have been the 5th annual G.O.D party, but it was my first. I had a really great time. I look forward to seeing you all in Toronto next weekend for your Pride Party!!!

Friday, June 16, 2006

My Girl Mariah


Mariah Carey is coming to town on Sunday August 13/06 and I have two tickets!

Being a gay man, it is expected that I have a 'shrine' dedicated to Madonna somewhere in my home, however this man does not. It's an admission that could have my "gay" card revoked permanently. Being the gamblin' man that I am, I like to live on the edge. Mariah is my girl of choice. There I said it!

Mariah is a songstress. She not only has a voice that can manipulate a song, but she really appears to sing from the heart. She writes most of her own material, in addition to collaborating with others.

I think the thing that I personally relate to about Mariah, is that she's struggled over the years with relationships, and life in general. She's 'cracked' under the strain of 'fame and fortune' and just seems 'real' in spite of the 'Bubble Gum', 'Butterfly', 'Boobies' and 'Booty' persona. I like that she's publicly exposed her vulnerability and admitted when things have been difficult. More power I say!

So, think of me on August 13/06. I'll be hookin' it up with Mimi.....

I came to have a party
Open off the Bacardi
Feeling so hot tamale
Boy, I know you watchin' me
So what's it gonna be
Purple taking me higher
I'm lifted and I like it
Boy, you got me inspired
Baby, come and get it
If you're really feeling me

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Always On Your Side


My yesterdays are all boxed up and neatly put away
But every now and then you come to mind
'Cause you were always waiting to be picked to play the game
But when your name was called, you found a place to hide
When you knew that I was always on your side

Well everything was easy then, so sweet and innocent
But my demons and my angels reappeared
Leavin' only traces of the man you thought I'd be
Too afraid to hear the words I'd always feared
Leavin' you with only questions all these years

But is there someplace far away, someplace where all is clear
Easy to start over with the ones you hold so dear
Or are you left to wonder, all alone, eternally
This isn't how it's really meant to be
No it isn't how it's really meant to be

Well they say that love is in the air, never is it clear,
Try to pull it close and make it stay
Butterflies are free to fly, and so they fly away
And I'm left to carry on and wonder why
Even through it all, I'm always on your side

But is there someplace far away, someplace where all is clear
Easy to start over with the ones you hold so dear
Or are you left to wonder, all alone, eternally
When this isn't how it's really meant to be
No it isn't how it's really meant to be

Well they say that love is in the air, never is it clear
How to pull it close and make it stay
Butterflies are free to fly, why do they fly away
Leavin' me to carry on and wonder why
Was it you that kept me wandering through this life
When you know that I was always on your side

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

A Star is Born!!!

On Saturday night my daughter Alexandria performed "Way Cool", a dance performance with her Jazz dance company. The show was held at Hamilton place, and was so entertaining. Not that I'm bias or anything.

The evening started with the younger age groups. Dancing 'Hippos' singing about "Belly Buttons", and progressed to dancing 'Ducks'. As the age groups progressed, the dancing got a little more structured. I was surprised actually, how talented some of the performers were.

Alex performed her number perfectly, and admitted to being only a 'little' nervous. It was a proud moment for her, and all her family was there to share it with her.

After the show, I presented Alex with a dozen long stem roses. She felt like a real lady.

I like to treat her with flowers for things like this, birthdays etc. I always open the car door for both of my kids. I think that Alex especially needs to have a bar set, for how men are to treat her in the world. I'll set the bar damn high for her! God help any and all of her prospective boyfriends.....They are going to have to contend with me. Nick also, I think needs to see how a lady should be treated. Chivalry is alive and well in the Frisby household!

Congratulations again Alex...we are so very proud of you angel!

Friday, June 09, 2006

Red Bull

I was at the gym last night, and observed someone who had just done a vigorous workout, leaving the gym. He was drinking a 'Red Bull' energy drink. I see people everywhere drinking this stuff, at work, at social events.

For some reason I automatically associate this beverage with "Jolt Cola" of the 80's. I don't know why I make this association, as I have never had neither a 'Jolt', nor a 'Red Bull'.

What struck me as interesting about the guy at the gym, is that he is obviously health conscious, and yet is putting a liquid in his body that may be doing more harm than good. I once read a CBC Market Place Article which I have attached, I don't think I will be purchasing a 'Red Bull' any time soon myself. Have a read, and decide for yourself!

CBC MARKETPLACE: YOUR HEALTH ENERGY DRINKS
Raging Bull: Health warnings over popular energy drink being brushed off?
Broadcast: February 6, 2005

Red Bull was recently approved for sale in Canada.
There's a new drink in town, and it's created quite a buzz. Literally.
Red Bull's high caffeine content, combined with other ingredients, gives people who drink the beverage quite the kick.
But Red Bull has been flagged by some health regulators as a potential danger.
It was recently approved for sale in Canada, although its label must carry several warnings for consumers. And Marketplace has discovered those warnings are being ignored.
Red Bull is an energy drink that's suddenly everywhere. Last year, people in 120 countries guzzled close to two billion cans of the trendy brew. It costs about $3 a shot in Canada.
Developed in Austria, Red Bull's marketing campaign promises the beverage "gives you wings".
FACT
A popular myth claims that one of Red Bull's ingredients, taurine, is an extract from a bull's testicles. While taurine is an amino acid naturally found throughout the body, the taurine found in Red Bull is entirely synthetic.
A drink that gives you wings? That sounds pretty powerful. So what exactly is Red Bull? The makers call it an "energy drink". People we've talked to describe it as "stimulating","addictive", even "crack in a can".
Red Bull: A tempest in a can
The label on a can of Red Bull boasts caffeine, vitamins, a carbohydrate (glucuronolactone), an amino acid (taurine), and about five teaspoons of sugar.
We tested Red Bull for those ingredients. We hired a laboratory to analyze the contents of the slender silver and blue can, and sure enough, the label's no bull. A 250 ml can of Red Bull contains, among other ingredients: 80 mg of caffeine (more than three times the caffeine that's in the same amount of Coke)1000 mg of taurine, an amino acid. It's a combination the company claims will boost your energy.
FACT
Enter the energy wars. In early 2005, the Coca-Cola company plans to launch a new energy drink of its own, Full Throttle. It aims to challenge energy leader, Red Bull.
That combination of ingredients in a can of Red Bull that has a lot of people talking. There's no long-term research on how caffeine, taurine and glucuronolactone interact in the body. That has some countries saying: "No studies? No thank you".
Countries like Norway, Denmark and France are so nervous about the can's contents, they've banned the sale of Red Bull.
French nutritionist Isabelle Vanrullen, who works with the country's food safety agency, says France banned the brew because of how the ingredients in Red Bull interact:
"There are various side effects for each one of these three substances, which vary in degrees of severity. And they can also interact with each other".
The French health committee canned the sale of Red Bull, partly because a study found that rats fed taurine exhibited bizarre behaviour. That behaviour, says Vanrullen, included: "anxiety, irritability, a high sensitivity to noise --sudden jumps in their cages-- and most of all, self-mutilations."
Red Bull is prohibited for sale as a normal soft drink in Denmark, Norway, and France. In 2001, Red Bull was investigated by the Swedish National Food Administration after being linked to three deaths.
Other countries, like Sweden and Iceland, are also concerned about Red Bull's stampede onto the market.
Part of the concern is that Red Bull is an energy drink, but it doesn't replenish the body after physical exertion (like sports drinks such as Gatorade).
In fact, because Red Bull has so much caffeine, it can actually dehydrate the drinker. That means if you're physically exerting yourself and drink just a Red Bull, the lack of hydration could strain your heart.
In 2000, Ross Cooney, a healthy, 18-year-old basketball player from Limerick, Ireland, collapsed on the court and died after drinking four cans of Red Bull before a basketball game.
The connection between Cooney's death and Red Bull remains inconclusive; a coroner's inquest found that he died as a result of Sudden Arrhythmia Death Syndrome (sudden death due to cardiac arrest brought on by an arrhythmic episode).
There have been other serious health events reported after people exerted themselves and drank Red Bull. But again, there's no evidence to conclude that the drink's ingredients affected people's hearts.
Two people have reported serious adverse health reactions after consuming the Red Bull energy drink. But Health Canada won't say what happened, or what the circumstances were.
The regulator will say that Red Bull was approved for sale, with strings attached.While sales of Red Bull have soared around the world, the drink had trouble charging into Canadian markets.
Regulators wouldn't let it in, stymied by the fact it's neither a food nor a drug.
Then, a year ago, Health Canada created new legislation for 'natural health products' to regulate everything from vitamins to herbal remedies and, ole! Red Bull was in.

Thursday, June 08, 2006

The Scientist


Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a silence apart

Nobody said it was easy, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy, Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start

Ohhhhhh ouuuuu
Ahhhhhh ouuuuu
Ohhhhhh ouuuuu
Ohhhhhh ouuuuu

~Coldplay

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Heart Strings

Tonight I attended my daughters Junior Choir performance. Rows upon rows of proud parents and grandparents gathered to hear their respective little one's singing their hearts out.

For someone who doesn't have children of their own, I'm sure at times it may have sounded like finger nails being scraped down a chalk board. For those parent's however, who's child was in the choir, it sounded like a symphony. Each little face beaming with pride, ever glancing in the direction of their own family members in the audience.

I have always said that when you are blessed with the birth of your own child, in that very instant, God takes your heart out of your own body. That new little soul not only possesses a heart of his or her own, but they now house yours as well.

Sitting in the audience with me tonight on my immediate right was my very 'lovely' ex-wife JoAnne. Not only is JoAnne my ex-wife and the mother of my children, but she is one of the bravest, strongest, and funniest women I know. She still has the ability to make me laugh like no one else. She sees through my 'front' and disarms me with single glance. Everyone who knows JoAnne and myself always remark on how well we get along.

We always tell our kids that we are still a 'family', but that Mom and Dad just don't live in the same house any longer. I think it's what makes our kids so well adjusted, they see their parents genuinely care and respect one another. It's something both JoAnne and I are very proud of. It affords us the ability to share our kids effortlessly.

When the kids were smaller and at my house, they would miss their Mom.
I told them that when a family loves one another they are always connected by "Heart Strings". So at bedtime, if they got teary about missing "Mommy" I would tell them to send her a message on their "Heart Strings", we would then sit and wait for a response. Within moments they would tell me that she had sent a message back, an "I love you" or such. They would do the same the nights they were at Jo's and missing me.

They are turning 11 and 9 this year, and haven't needed to talk about "Heart Strings" for a while. Just for the record, mine are still connected, not only to Nick and Alex, but to the woman who was on my right this evening.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Nick and Alex

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you, yet they belong not to you.
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.
You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

~Kahlil Gibran

I love you guys. You are the best two kids on the planet, and I thank God for you both!!!

Friday, June 02, 2006

City of Blinding Lights


The more you see the less you know
The less you find out as you go
I knew much more then than I do now

Neon heart, day-glow eyes
The city lit by fireflies
They're advertising in the skies
And people like us

And I miss you when you're not around
I'm getting ready to leave the ground

Oh you look so beautiful tonight...

Don't look before you laugh
Look ugly in a photograph
Flash bulbs, purple irises the camera can't see

I've seen you walk unafraid
I've seen you in the clothes you've made
Can you see the beauty inside of me?
What happened to the beauty I had inside of me?

And I miss you when you're not around
I'm getting ready to leave the ground

Oh you look so beautiful tonight...tonight
In the city of blinding lights

Time...time....time...won't leave me as I am
But time won't take the boy out of this man
Oh you look so beautiful tonight
Oh you look so beautiful tonight
Oh you look so beautiful tonight

In the city of blinding lights,
The more you know
The less you feel
Some pray for, others steal
Blessings not just for the ones who kneel, luckily

Thursday, June 01, 2006

The New Gay???

I had an interesting conversation with a colleague at work today. He asked me if I was going to attend Gay Pride in Toronto this year? I am attending a House Warming/Pride party at a friends house on the Saturday night, so will be downtown.

I need to preface what I am about to write with the following caveat....I am gay, and proud of who I am. I am not ashamed of being gay, and am openly gay in all areas of my life.

Having said that, being gay for me is about loving (sexually/romantically) another man. Full Stop. I still don't quite understand the whole 'stereotypical' gay life that so many gay men seems to choose...or does it choose them?. I see so many gay men in there late 30's early 40's still clinging to the youth driven subcultures that exist in the gay world. The need to be "fabulous", "glamorous" and "partying" still seems to permeate otherwise well balanced lives. Gay men are expected to be 'chiseled', 'ripped', 'hairless', and meticulously 'groomed', it's a very high expectation. What happens if you fall short of this unrealistic expectation? Maybe drowning your sorrows in "Cocktails", under the guise of being "just fabulous" thank you?!?! Something to think about?

The interesting phenomena that I see developing is that gay youth seem to be resisting a lot of this. Gay men are coming out at a much younger age, are factoring in children, and marriage, and will attest to finding much better quality food and better tasting drinks at many varied establishments city wide. The food/drink quality of the establishments at the intersection of Church and Wellesley leave much to be desired in my opinion, and I think that is being reflected in dwindling numbers in attendance in the Village these days. I mean, why can't two gay men go out and have dinner in Bloor West Village or call me crazy....How about the Lakeshore in Oakville? If they act like everyone else in the world, why shouldn't they? Or do they stand out in a way that makes them different? The question I pose is if they do act differently than every other male of the human species, why???

Even the media is changing. Ang Lee took on the brave project of directing Brokeback Mountain. A poignant 'love story' that involved two men. But wait a minute? Were they really gay??? I mean, where was Madonna? Kylie? Prada? Disco Balls? Poppers? Or was it just two men that were in love? Could it be their being 'gay' was just about their love for one another? And imagine, in the absence of all the 'gay' window dressing and idioms. I realize that the era made it difficult for the two characters to be together, and they ultimately weren't, but indulge me in the idea. The idea that, being gay can exist in the absence of all the stereotypical typecasting.

'New Country' left behind 'plaid' table cloths and "There's a tear in my Beer" for a more sophisticated hip country. Is it possible that it's time to embrace a 'new gay'?

Imagine a gay man being portrayed on television as a father, a professional and not a 'campy' interior designer?. Oprah is always so relieved to see a black man in a movie that isn't being portrayed as either a Rapper or a Pimp. Perhaps a new gay 'standard' is in order?

Gay for me exists quite effortlessly, it is who I am, I live in Burlington, because I grew up there, and it's where my family and friends are. I promote a positive gay example for my community by assimilating into it. Not quite as loud and in your face as Toronto Pride, but effective non the less......Try it on Brothers!